Bad DJ, Bad!

This one's a little long, but it's worth the read.

It seems we finally found a DJ that seems like he'll be able to be on the same wavelength as us. Along the way, we encountered a lot of characters who seemed to be more about putting on a little show than actually trying to do what we need. It just started to become easier to just be upfront with the type of DJ we were looking for--someone that doesn't lead the room in the chicken dance, insist on the dollar dance game, yell on the mike for five of every ten minutes, and give out glow necklaces and blow up air guitars...oh yes, air guitars, and people really do pay for that. Whodathunkit? Now do they really enjoy it? I guess anything is fun when you're drunk.

So here's my original inquiry...

looking for rate and package information. We are planning this wedding..to be held in Cohassett, MA, from California. As many people in our circle of friends are professional night club DJs and promoters in Los Angeles, we are VERY picky about sound/music and looking for someone willing to meet our needs. We don't want to hire an MC. It's our show, not the DJs. Our reception will include guests of all ages and we understand the need to entertain all, but we don't want people to leave our wedding thinking they heard the same cliche, overplayed wedding songs you hear at everywhere. Our goal is to avoid that at all costs. My apologies for the long winded comments, but I just want to be sure we're on the same page before proceeding further in case you feel you are unable to meet out needs. Thank you.

Seems clear enough. Note the part where I say that the wedding will include guests of all ages and that we understand the need to entertain everyone. Here's the response...

Hello,
I was sent your information from a fellow associate. We get these types of requests frequently. From my 26 years experience I find The reason for this I find is the prospective clent has attended an event that had an obnoxious DJ. One thing however that did catch my eye was your circle of friends being NIGHT CLUB DJS. A wedding and a night club are two different Animals. and most nightclub djs ,as wonderful as they are spinnin vinyl. well basically, ruin a wedding. In a nightclub, the DJ has free reign to play what they please along as it is in the clubs format and therefore plays their choice of music whether the dance floor likes it or not, In a club people go there to drink and the crowd doesn't start until 11pm. Most attendees of a club arrive half drunk or whatever. I say this because I was a resident DJ in Miami for 2 years. Many a couple have hired a DJ that plays at their club and the wedding flopped. A club dj is one sided , an event dj has to be multi- faceted. You need to play to young and old. That's right! Aunts , uncles , grandparents and parents. So a DJ needs to start out first being an MC, something most club djs have never had to do. The coordinate the series of events so things like cake cutting , first dance etc. run smoothly and are timed. You are correct, it is your show, but a professional DJ also realizes it is his companies reputation online. So we try to attend to everyone's styles and genres. So I caution you, this is Massachusetts, what about your LOCAL ATTENDEES, what do you think they are going to like. A professional DJ has music for everyone and does a rotation of this music so EVERYONE has a great time. That is the goal for everyone to have a good time, if not why invite them? Enjoy......


Best Wishes
Darin Boisvert
The Perfect Mix Entertainment Company
Anyone can DJ...... We Entertain!
www.perfectmix.net
Tel: 978-345-1151

Wha...wha...whaaaaaat?! Wow....ask for information and get a lecture in return. While Darin Boisvert is completely out of line, it would be funny to see my grandmother trying to dance to techno music when we turn the wedding reception into a rave like he seemed to assume we would. I don't like who make baseless assumptions cop an attitude, so I of course replied...

Thank you for the reply but to quote my original message, "Our reception will include guests of all ages and we understand the need to entertain all." I would never hire a club DJ to play a wedding. We have friends that have residencies at some of the hottest clubs in LA...playing for the types of events that you read about in US Weekly and I wouldn't pay them to play at our reception either. Our circle of friends has led us to become very detail oriented and picky when it comes to music, but it has not made us ignorant. Those are two very different things. If we were having a reception that was including only those friends, we wouldn't be contacting wedding or event DJs to begin with.

I stated that I didn't want to hire an attention grabbing MC, wanted to avoid the cliche songs, and requested rate and package information. I did NOT say that I wanted to hire someone to play five hours of house and techno. I don't think those requests are overly demanding, and I've made the exact same request to several vendors and have had very positive dialogues with a few DJs thus far. After hearing my concerns, they asked me some questions, and then we came to a mutual understanding about the vision my fiance and I have for the event. To me, that seems like the way to do good business.

That said, all I get in reply from you is a very condescending message that's trying to lecture me about what's right and what's wrong before you have even tried to contact me to fully understand what I'm looking for. Frankly, your description of club DJs is insulting as well. What they may play is different than what you'll have at a wedding, but the end goal is exactly the same. If my friends don't get the room dancing, they don't get hired again. As far as arriving half drunk, well lets just say I've been to my fair share of weddings where sobriety was a distant concept.

You add that the wedding DJ needs to represent their company. I'm not hiring someone to promote a business without regard to our needs. That makes no sense to me. As I see it, a desirable DJ should feel confident in their ability to incorporate their client's needs into their understanding and experience of how to have a successful party--which is why I was upfront about what we were looking for. If they can't do that, they shouldn't take the job. Other DJs I've spoken with have not raised concern that the party would be a failure or that they would take a negative hit on their reputation. These are not fly-by-night vendors either. They come highly recommended from the Red Lion where we will be holding our reception.

I'm sorry for the rant, but it upsets me that you didn't answer my questions or provide the information I requested. Since you felt the need to send unsolicited advice, here's some in return....before you go off on a potential client who's simply looking for information, try understanding what it is they really need.

This is the type of guy that probably has been on autopilot doing weddings for the last 15 years. If the man didn't get it the first time, I thought my reply made it very clear that we weren't idiots and were planning for a reception that could be enjoyed by all our guests. I was wrong and he needed to continue the lecture...(and he can't let go of the nightclub thing)

Please read my email closer. My email was not meant to be condescending at all. In twenty six years I see DJ's ruin weddings because they fail to educate the client. Being a guest or an observer at a wedding is far from being the planner and guest of honor. As I stated I was once a prominent resident club DJ and am now a prominent Wedding DJ. What I said was a club is a different atmosphere than a wedding and most club DJs that venture into the wedding market have a hard time separating the two venues. It happens! This is why I got out of the club market, your mind is in a different zone musically.

Secondly when I was talking about people arriving drunk, I was talking about the club scene and certainly not your wedding. At a club people arrive already primed and ready to go so essentially the DJ can get away with playing whatever he wants. At a wedding the dj has to warm up the guests with a compliment of both personality and music. My obligation to anyone is to help in the planning and to set the expectations through years of observations at real weddings. Case in Point, We had a client from New York that wanted dance music played between courses. Knowing the size of the venue I knew it would be detrimental to the timely serving and advised that it could cause them to run into overtime with the caterer. What I got was "well that's how we do it in New York" From the Bride. However the wedding wasn't in New York and Halls and caterers run at a different pace. I can only advise, so I agreed to do it her way. The long and short of it was, after food was being spilled and peopled weren't sitting down for the serving, She told me to do what I thought best. Which is why people hire professionals in the first place, to have a stress free event. You made a statement that this is how good business should be done. True and my point is that any professional entertainer that wants to stay in business will not bend on the integrity of his business to make a buck. We don't take just any job we see if the clients are a fit. For instance I would not play anything inappropriate at any function if it was going to offend anyone! Regardless of what my client wants. My business has been built on that concept and I will elaborate. We did a wedding, around 5 hours into the groom came up and wanted me to play a song with very explicit lyrics. I would not as there were children and elderly there as well as the clergy. I said I could probably play it a little later with these guest leave. Well when the bride found out what I did at the end of the night, she hugged me and gave be a considerable sized gratuity for being the consummate professional and not bending on my integrity. We as DJs audition for work at every event we do. We are in business to stay in business, and haven't had a complaint about the quality of services we provide.

Lastly you said your vendors came from The Red Lion, well I received your info from a DJ that received your info from an online planner called wedj.com. No I never said your music wouldn't work, I just cautioned you in regards to looking for what looked like a club DJ. You spend $20- 50 to get into a club, you spend $25,000 and up to plan a wedding, I was just ADVISING you. I didn't give a price because I wasn't considering doing the wedding I was just trying to help out. Some DJs will promise you the world and yes you to death, but ultimately when the wedding starts you can't change your mind on the choices you made. I wish you good luck and apologize if my email was misconstrued.

I wanted to reply, but I resisted the urge. Could you imaigine what this guy must be like to work with?

If you'll be attending the wedding just know that no matter what music you're into, or what age you may be, or whether you like to stand or dance, it will be fun for everyone. Liz and I would have it no other way. And no, we didn't hire Darrin Boisvert.